Family Travel: 3 Commandments to Live By

Start with a mindset shift. Ben Groundwater, a seasoned traveller, says the biggest early mistake is assuming trips feel the same after kids arrive. That expectation sets you up for stress.

Slow down. Pack for mess. Put your kids’ needs first so everyone enjoys the trip. These are simple changes that make a big difference.

We promise a clear, three-commandment framework that makes family travel doable—even when you’re exhausted. It helps Aussie parents juggle school calendars and long-haul flights without losing their cool.

This isn’t about perfection. It’s about better memories, less stress, and more connection as you explore the world together. ✈️ 🧳

Which part of travel with kids stresses you most—packing, flights, or routines?

Key Takeaways

• Shift your mindset: trips change after kids, and that’s okay.
• Slow the pace and plan for mess to keep stress low.
• Use the three-commandment framework to make any trip doable.
• Focus on kids’ needs first for smoother days and happier memories.
• Practical tips cover pace, packing, airports and choosing the right destination.

Why family travel changes everything once you have kids

Adding children to your suitcase changes more than the packing list. Logistics multiply, routines matter, and the old pace you loved rarely fits a modern trip. This is normal, not a failure.

“It’s not a holiday – it’s a trip.”

It’s not a holiday, it’s a trip

Think of this as a mindset shift. You can still love travel, but you may work harder than at home—especially with young kids. Feeling tired or not wholly relaxed is expected. That frame frees you from guilt and sets realistic expectations.

Every child is different, so trust your gut

• Temperament, sleep and food can differ hugely between children.
• Sensory limits and boredom change daily decisions and routes.
• Trust your instinct on environments, childcare and overstimulation—it’s practical safety advice.

Quick self-check: What are your child’s two biggest triggers—tiredness, hunger, boredom or heat? Note them before you leave.

Accepting these truths is the foundation for the three-commandment mindset: acceptance first, then tactics. Over the years, what works for one group may not work for yours—and that’s okay. Use that freedom to plan a trip that fits your people, not the image of a perfect holiday.

Family travel tips: the three commandments mindset

Hold three go-to rules that cut stress and help you choose what matters. Use them mid-meltdown, mid-transit or whenever you wonder if the day is salvageable.

Plan for reality, not your pre-kids travel style

Expect slower mornings, extra stops and fewer back-to-back bookings. That’s normal.

Set low-effort goals for each day. One main outing plus a local park or playground keeps energy high and stress low.

Prioritise the kids’ needs to protect everyone’s enjoyment

Putting children first isn’t ruining your trip — it prevents blow-ups and saves time. Calm kids mean calm adults.

“When we shift to what the kids need, the whole day gets easier.”

Slow travel creates better memories for families

Stay longer in fewer places. Fewer check-ins, less packing and more routine mean better sleep and richer local experiences.

Quick framework preview: Commandment 1 — do less. Commandment 2 — pack smart. Commandment 3 — stay flexible.

Screenshot this: keep the three rules handy and use them as your go-to planning shortcut. You don’t need perfect days — just a repeatable way to decide what matters on any trip.

Commandment: Slow down and do less

Make space in your itinerary so kids can breathe and unwind. This isn’t about missing out — it’s choosing what actually works for your group.

Halve your plans, then halve them again. Everything takes longer with children: packing, potty stops, prams. Cutting the list stops stress before it starts.

Keep to one or two key activities per day

Pick one anchor activity and treat everything else as a bonus. A morning at the zoo, then quiet time back at your accommodation keeps naps intact.

Build in downtime for naps, resets, and overstimulation

Downtime is non-negotiable. Quiet play, pool time or simply watching trains helps kids reset. You’ll see fewer meltdowns and better sleep.

Go to fewer places and stay longer

Staying put reduces packing, fewer transitions and more routine. The result: happier children and less parent fatigue.

Add a cushion day for jet lag and transitions

For long-haul trips from Australia, add a day to adapt to time zones. Condé Nast Traveller recommends a buffer day for smoother adjustment.

Micro-prompt: If you could do only ONE thing at this destination, what would it be? Use that to cut clutter and enjoy your trip your way. 😊

Commandment: Pack smart and be ready for mess

A few clever choices in your bag change the whole day. Pack for quick resets, not perfection.

Wet wipes and a spare outfit are non-negotiable. Keep nappies, a zip bag for dirty clothes, and basic meds in one easy-to-grab pouch. That single move cuts meltdowns fast.

Pack light, then buy basics at your destination

Less to lug means less stress. Bring essentials and plan to buy extras like sunscreen or nappies if you need them at your destination. This works well once you’ve travelled a few months with babies or toddlers.

Carry-on must-haves

• In the carry-on: meds, a change of clothes, nappies/wipes, and a special comfort toy — make sure you can reach them on the plane.
• Keep anything hard to replace in case of lost luggage.

Small gear that changes everything

Think compact prams (Stokke Yoyo-style or Pockit Air), a clip-on high chair like Mountain Buggy Pod, inflatable boosters and bed bumpers. Pack fewer things and choose flexibility over items that mimic home.

Backup comfort toy tip: bring a “dupe stuffie” so a lost toy doesn’t wreck the day. Mess will happen; your aim is fast resets and calm kids. 😊

Commandment: Protect everyone’s sanity with flexibility

Plan to bend the day when things go sideways — flexibility is the real skill here. Kids get sick, weather flips, and one extra stop can tip the whole day. Being willing to change course saves time and stress.

Expect the unexpected and adapt fast.

Expect the unexpected and adapt fast

Give yourself permission to reset the day. Return to your room, grab takeaway, swap a museum for a pool session. These choices keep the mood calm and the day salvageable.

Reset the day instead of forcing the itinerary

Quick swaps work well: move sightseeing to early morning, replace a sit-down restaurant with a picnic, or do a short tour followed by playground time. These small pivots keep routines on track and save energy.

Calm parents create calm kids

Your tone and body language set the emotional temperature. Acting calm reduces escalation and helps kids regulate.

• Try a 3–10 minute breathing reset.
• Step aside for a quick pause or tag-team with your partner.
• Ask, “What do we need right now?” to get clarity fast.

“We can change the plan; we don’t have to change the whole trip.”

Good enough is fine. You’re building memories over time, not executing a flawless itinerary. This way of thinking makes life on the road kinder, saner and more enjoyable for parents and kids alike. 😊

Choose a destination and travel style that fits your family

Pick places and a pace that let your youngest set the rhythm for each day. That simple rule makes planning easier and keeps meltdowns down. Start by asking what your child needs most: naps, routine or space to run.

Match the pace to your youngest child

Your youngest sets the ceiling for the whole trip. If naps are sacred, build days around rest. If your child sleeps anywhere, you can push the day a little further.

When road trips beat flights for Aussie parents

Road trips give flexibility: easy stops, familiar food and control over timing. They suit parents who need predictable naps or who carry more gear. Flights win when distance is large and time is limited.

When public transport and walkable cities make life easier

Choose a walkable place with reliable buses or trains and you’ll move faster without the car-seat shuffle. Kids can watch the world go by and you can reset on the go.

Practical prompt: what’s non‑negotiable—sleep, food, routine or space to run? Pick the way that supports your three commandments: slow down, pack smart and stay flexible. The right destination doesn’t have to be far; it just needs to fit your family right now. 😊

Age matters more than you think

Different ages demand different rhythms — and that’s a relief. Knowing this helps you set expectations and make smarter choices before you leave.

Why babies can be easier than toddlers

Counter-intuitive truth: babies are often more portable. They nap anywhere and follow simple routines.

This makes packing and short transit legs easier when children are very young. You’ll manage sleep and feeds with fewer disruptions.

The toddler window and how to plan around it

The toddler stage combines walking, big feelings and short attention spans. A toddler can be mobile but still need constant supervision.

Practical planning: shorter legs, playground stops, early high-energy activities, and strict snack/toilet rhythms calm meltdowns fast.

Keeping teens engaged by giving them a say

Older kids want autonomy, privacy and a voice. Let them pick an activity or food spot to cut complaining and boost cooperation.

Accommodation needs shift: kitchen and laundry for little ones; Wi‑Fi and personal space for teens.

Quick meeting template:

1. Each child names one must‑do.
2. Parents pick one must‑do.
3. Protect one rest day. ✅

Reality check: every year brings new wins and new challenges. You’ll adjust over years, not overnight. This is age‑appropriate planning, not perfect parenting.

Flights and airports without the meltdown

A calm plan for the airport and plane can stop a small problem becoming a full-blown meltdown. A few simple steps before you leave home set the tone for the whole day. Use the checklist below to make transitions smoother and save your sanity on long legs from Australia.

Before you leave home

Reframe screen time: on long-haul flights it’s a tool, not a failure. Download shows and games, charge devices, pack headphones and save offline backups.

Try this quick preflight action: air travel hacks — download, charge, and test everything before you lock the door.

At the airport

Ask the desk about family lanes, play areas and priority help. Many airports offer these but they aren’t always obvious.

Snack, move, reset: schedule short movement breaks in the terminal. A quick walk or playground stop eases pent-up energy.

On the plane

Seating strategies for a family of four: either split adults across two rows to contain movement, or book aisle + window and hope for empty middles. Have a backup plan if someone takes the seat.

Pack spare snacks, a small activity kit and offer screens as a calm-down tool for tricky stretches of the day.

On landing

Avoid scheduling the longest leg late in the day when everyone’s already tired. If you must arrive late, build in a relaxed first night at your home base to reset.

“You’re managing kids, not performing for strangers.”

• Quick checklist: download content, charge devices, pack headphones.
• Ask about family lanes and play areas at your airport.
• Plan seating and movement breaks on the plane.

Trains, planes and getting around on the ground

When wheels meet tracks, the whole day can feel calmer for kids. Trains let children stand, wander a carriage and watch the world slide by. That movement alone cuts fuss and keeps energy in check.

Compare in plain language: planes demand you stay seated for long stretches. Trains give space, easier toilet access and a lower “stay put” pressure. For short intercity hops or places with strong rail networks, a train often wins.

Build a break rhythm into every travel day:

• Snack break + toilet break + stretch — repeat before kids hit the wall.
• Stop before you need to stop. Once a child says “I need to wee”, you’re late.
• Make breaks part of the trip, not wasted time — they protect the rest of the day.

What to carry in your day bag: wipes, water, easy snacks, spare undies, and one small activity. Rotate that activity so novelty stays high. In Australia, regional trains plus a short road leg often beat an extra flight for stress and cost.

“Slow the pace and plan the stops — it’s how you keep everyone functioning.”

Accommodation that actually works for families

What looks roomy on a booking site often feels tight once bedtime routines arrive. A cot, pram and bags eat into floor space fast. Your neat room becomes a maze at bedtime.

Choose space that works, not just looks good. Apartments or family suites with a separate living area change evenings. A kitchen lets you do simple breakfasts and late-night snacks. Laundry means fewer clothes on the trip and less stress.

Quick vetting checklist — make sure the place is truly child-ready:

• Stair safety and balcony locks.
• Breakables out of reach and pool fencing.
• Actual room layout photos (not just stylised shots).
• Noise from neighbouring rooms and traffic levels.

Real-world caution

One case: a supposedly child-friendly apartment in Bologna had cacti at toddler eye height. Reviews and photos saved that trip — don’t skip them.

Safe sleep checks

When a hotel provides a cot, make sure it has no pillows or duvets, the mattress fits snugly and there are no gaps. Standards vary outside Australia, so trust what you know is safe.

If you’re unsure, bring a port-a-cot. A separate living area or balcony also protects your evening: if kids sleep at 7pm, you can relax without tiptoeing.

Bottom line: the best hotel isn’t the fanciest. It’s the one that makes day‑to‑day life easy for your home on the road. 😊

Food, snacks and keeping costs reasonable

Hungry kids can end a day faster than bad weather — plan like that. Food is an easy win. A small snack stash buys calm, time and fewer meltdowns.

Eat local, but carry backup snacks

Let your group try local eats for richer experiences. Still, pack safe snacks for picky moments or jet‑lag odd hours.

Set up simple breakfasts in your room

Request a larger fridge or book a kitchenette. Milk, fruit and cereal in the hotel room stop hungry wake‑ups and save money.

Balance adventurous meals with familiar favourites

Use one adventurous dinner plus a familiar option. Share plates and invite one‑bite tries so kids stay curious without pressure.

Ramen or yakiniku-style places can be fun and interactive, but keep snacks handy if a child refuses. You don’t need expensive dining to make great memories — picnics count. For more on cost-saving food approaches, see keep food costs down on holiday.

Practical prompt: what are your two “safe foods” you can find almost anywhere?

Meltdown prevention that works in real life

Know the common triggers so you can stop fights before they start. When you recognise the cause, you can act fast and save the day.

The four most common triggers

• Tired — overtired kids lose patience fast.
• Hungry — low blood sugar equals sudden meltdowns.
• Bored — long waits turn small annoyances into big ones.
• Heat — overheating makes mood and behaviour worse.

Quick prevention tactics

Simple routines stop many issues: schedule downtime and naps, keep a snack rhythm, plan short novelty activities and look for shade or water breaks on hot days.

Pack an “on-hand” entertainment kit

Keep one small kit in your bag for queues: stickers, mini colouring pads, a card game and a small toy. Rotate items each day so they feel new.

Use rewards without guilt

Bribery works when you need a quick win. Choose rewards intentionally — a small treat or extra screen time — and use them sparingly so they stay effective.

Parent note: your patience is a resource. Eat, hydrate and tag‑team when you can. Meltdowns will happen — good systems just shorten them and get you back to enjoying the day. 😊

Quality time is the main attraction

What your child will remember most is you, not the landmark. That makes carving out real connection the smartest part of your plan.

Build in one-on-one time with each child

Try short “micro dates” that put one child in the spotlight. A lemonade run, a beach walk, or a quick shop can feel enormous to them.

Rotate these so each child gets attention without derailing the day. Small moments add up to big memories. 😊

Use childcare and babysitters to create parent time

Childcare can be a secret weapon. A trusted sitter for a date night resets energy and improves the next day for everyone.

Use hotel recommendations, recent reviews and your gut when hiring help. If something feels off, say no. Safety first.

Let kids play and socialise wherever you are

Playgrounds, resort pools and parks are where kids make friends fast — even across language barriers.

Group dynamics can be intense; letting kids split off for play often improves the whole vibe. Kids come back happier and calmer.

“The biggest attraction is you.”

• Remember: your presence is the main event for kids, so protect that time.
• Micro dates are simple: 10–30 minutes of attention works wonders.
• Childcare is optional, but powerful — use it strategically.

Parent note: carving out time for yourselves isn’t selfish — it’s part of keeping the trip sustainable and joyful for everyone.

Reflective prompt: What would your child say was the best part of this trip?

Family-friendly destinations to consider from Australia

Pick a destination that makes your days simple, not stressful. Choose a place that supports your three commandments: slow pace, fewer bases and flexible days. Below are shortlist options that work well when you’re leaving from Australia.

Australia: big adventures without long‑haul stress

Why it works: Close flights, beaches, camping and national parks make this a low‑risk way to chase big adventures.

Road trips and short hops keep routines intact. You can stay longer in one spot and avoid long transits for children.

Fiji: resorts, kids’ clubs and true rest

Why it works: Many resorts run excellent kids’ clubs and childcare. Meals and logistics are family-friendly, so parents actually get a break.

Result: relaxed days, reliable childcare and easy island vibes that feel like a proper reset.

Japan: safe, clean and surprisingly easy with children

Why it works: Safety, spotless public facilities and child‑friendly dining make city exploration manageable.

You’ll find helpful transport, plentiful toilets and cultural spots that entertain different ages — great for mixing cities and local culture.

Spain & Canada: culture, evenings and the great outdoors

Spain: Kids are welcome at night. Late dinners and lively plazas mean you can enjoy evenings without stress.

Canada: A nature powerhouse — hiking, lakes, skiing and predictable safety. It’s ideal for road trips and outdoor adventures across the seasons.

Quick chooser: Do you need “easy mode” (resort), “city easy” (Japan/Spain), or “outdoors easy” (Australia/Canada)?

For a practical how-to on choosing Aussie options and pacing your trip, see how to holiday with kids in. 😊

Conclusion

Make the most of short windows—these moments with kids don’t last forever.

Keep the three commandments simple: do less, pack smart, stay flexible. Use them on the next trip and they’ll steady even the hardest day.

Think of outings as a trip, not a perfect holiday. That mindset reduces pressure and helps you focus on what matters most.

One small action: pick one upcoming trip (even close to home) and “halve it twice.”

Also, make sure you pack the basics: snacks, downtime and a backup plan. Over the years you’ll get better at reading your children and the process gets easier.

These trips are a gift—your time together is the point. Save this checklist or share it with your travel buddy. 😊